PEBBLE
You can’t recover until you know what you’re recovering from.
~Kathy, written and shared by Kathy in Wisconsin
BOULDER
When you stand and share your story in an empowering way, your story will heal you and your story will heal somebody else.
~Iyanla Vanzant, shared by Brandi in California
PONDER
Way back in my days as a grad student, I was hired by large company’s employee assistance program to help them develop a set of questions they could use to check in with folks who had recently completed alcohol or substance use rehabilitation. Since many of those folks would be attending twelve step programs, they asked me to attend several open Alcoholics Anonymous meetings to gain a better understanding of the verbage and the vibe.
Even though I haven’t personally been affected by addiction, it was an enormously valuable experience. Not only did it help shatter lingering stereotypes and misconceptions I held about those in recovery, I picked up quite a few useful strategies for personal growth and development that I have found helpful in my life and my work.
Last fall I spent time with a remarkable group of AmeriCorps Members, several of whom were serving communities as recovery coaches. One of them, Kathy, shared the wisdom we feature as today’s Pebble, a mantra she developed to help herself and others in recovery. When I reached out to ask for a little more information, she responded with even more wisdom:
“I struggled with my recovery for many years. I never knew why it was such a big deal until a mentor suggested I try counseling to figure out what I was trying to hide from. Once I found the right counselor, things really started to make more sense: I was trying to bury lots of trauma I had experienced in my life with alcohol and drugs. I gradually realized that until I healed from those traumas I would never be able to start my recovery journey. It has taken many years, but as I healed, my recovery became so much easier.”
Over the years, several friends and colleagues who are in recovery have shared their stories and their learnings with me, and I’ve found that much of what has been helpful to their recovery can be applied to personal growth and healing work that just about every human being needs.
The biggest lesson i’ve carried with me is that healing and recovery remain elusive until we are ready to acknowledge that we need help. This actually provides a double whammy of hope by recognizing things aren’t going like we want/need them to AND opens the door to get/accept help from others. Anne Lamott uses a line she says she picked up from her recovery community: “The opposite of addiction isn’t sobreity, it’s connection.”
Whatever recovery and healing might help YOU grow and prosper these days, I hope you’ll remember that even baby steps are progress, and that asking for help is a sign of strength not weakness.
Peace,
Paul
P.S. If you are struggling today, I hope you’ll see this as a sign to reach out to a trusted friend, advisor, counselor and tell them you want help. Here in the United States, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is available for you to call or text at any time. You’re worth it.
