PEBBLE
I asked a therapist why resting is so hard for me, and she said “Because you confuse rest with being unproductive, and being unproductive with being unworthy.” I can never unhear that.
~Allyssa LaScala (lightly edited), shared by Erin in Vancouver, BC
BOULDER
Rest is to take those moments to understand that you’re not defined by what you produce, and to be okay with whatever you are. It’s to allow that emptiness of mind to prolong whenever you see something beautiful, and to understand that this is not an anomaly, but a glimpse into the reality of what truly is.
~Lawrence Yeo, shared by Linda in Fairfax, VA via The Riddle of Rest
PONDER
A few weeks ago I woke up feeling more tired than I had when I fell asleep. The clock indicated that plenty of time had passed since I went to bed…so I concluded that I had “slept enough.” I pushed myself into my morning routine that included walking a few miles. I made it, but it was a slog. For several more hours I was able to tend to my usual work tasks, and squeezed in some household chores, too.
It was midday before I paused long enough to realize I was doing that thing I sometimes do: trying to convince myself that I didn’t need any more rest even though my body and my brain were both patiently-yet-persistently trying to whisper, “Uhm, yes you do.”
Then I remembered a line I had scribbled down from one of Dr. Raquel Martin’s videos I had stumbled upon a while back: “If your rest isn’t restorative, it’s time to shift, not shame yourself for being lazy.”
It turns out there are no less than seven different types of rest we need to feel restored: physical, mental, emotional, social, sensory, creative, and spiritual. This helps me notice how often I reduce rest to sleep, when sometimes what I actually need is quiet, beauty, solitude, connection, fewer inputs, fewer expectations, or maybe just a little more space for my soul to exhale.
I’m still not great at this. My inner productivity manager likes to carry a clipboard and look disappointed. But I’m learning that rest is not a reward for finishing everything. Rest is part of how we remember we are not machines, metrics, or unfinished to-do lists with legs.
The next time you feel “more tired than you should,” I hope you’ll pause before pushing through and ask a gentler question: What kind of tired am I, and what kind of rest might actually restore me?
Not because you earned it.
Because you’re worthy of it.
Peace,
Paul
P.S. I’ll be resting quite a bit in the coming weeks as I take a break. I’ve been preparing, though, I promise! I have several fresh Ripples all queued up for your Monday morning musings.