Ripples #1219: Curating Our Choices

PEBBLE

We rarely have time for everything we want in this life, so we need to make choices. And hopefully your choices can come from a deep sense of who you are.
-Mister Rogers (adapted slightly), shared by Kelly in New Hampshire

BOULDER

It’s not that we have too little time to do all the things we need to do. It’s that we feel the need to do too many things in the time we have.
-Gary Keller​, shared by Mike in Los Angeles, CA

PONDER

“I don’t think I’ve experienced you as this frazzled since we entered the Time of Covidia.”

This was not an easy thing for me to hear, especially since it was coming from my therapist. I’ve been telling myself a story that since I have fewer work projects on my plate than I did before the pandemic, I have room for just about anything else I want to tackle. It is easy for me to forget that I have more creativity and excitement for imagining possibilities than I do time and bandwidth to manifest them into reality.

Does that mean I need to force myself to dream less? I hope not, and I don’t think so! I suspect it’s less about restricting my imagination and more to do with gently reminding myself over and over (and over) that while it is possible that I can do just about ANYTHING I put my mind to, I cannot do EVERYTHING that pops into my mind. Resolving this discrepancy requires curation: managing my expectations, paring down my to-do list, and being more selective about which priorities to focus on.

My insecurities and people pleasing tendencies tend to override my self preservation instincts, so I often make wiser decisions about whether to say YES or NO to something if I avoid making quick decisions, especially when I’m put on the spot. I try to give myself at least a day and preferably a few days, before responding to requests. (A line I often use when I feel pressured: “If you need an answer NOW, the answer has to be NO.” This easier for me to say when I remember I’m really declining their timeline and not their request.)

If you’re feeling a little more frazzled than you’d like, maybe its time to press pause and assess your schedule and your expectations and your wellbeing to consider what adjustments might elevate your effectiveness and enjoyment. Curate mindfully!

Peace,
Paul
P.S. I’m super jazzed to see so many people enjoying our new DailySplash.me where we post a quote each day. Feel free to use the contact links that are right below the quote on that page to share feedback, concerns, etc.

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