PEBBLE
Just because you are happy it does not mean that the day is perfect but that you have looked beyond its imperfections.
-Bob Marley, shared by Lorene in Ohio
BOULDER
I just discovered a terrific time saving tip!
Every day when I wake up I decide not to:
~kick myself about past mistakes,
~whine about resentments.
~make lists in my head of all my regrets,
~count up all the people who let me down in the past,
~continue to count on people who fill me with anxiety.
Yep.
It’s amazing how much extra free time I now have in a day
which I can use to spend doing more of what I love
with the people I love.
Plus I’m happier while I’m doing it!
-Karen Salmansohn, shared by a friend
PONDER
It would be sooo great if everything went like we wanted it to.
When life unfolds like it’s supposed to, lots of things go right:
- People show up where and when they’re supposed to.
- Stuff we order online shows up on time with nothing broken or missing.
- We remember to pick up everything at the grocery store, and even remember to bring the coupons (the ones that AREN’T expired).
- The weather cooperates with our mood and our needs (especially for something as special as a total eclipse!).
- The internet is fast and reliable and everything we read online is accurate and helpful.
- We say everything we want to say to someone, and don’t say anything that we later wish we had said differently or hadn’t said at all.
- Your special hoodie doesn’t get a chocolate stain on it from a yummy dessert that your sweetie made.
We *deserve* for life to unfold like this. We’re good people, darnit, and we’ve earned the right for things to go smoothly. Unfortunately, there’s the bummer reality: despite what we want and despite what we deserve, life doesn’t usually unfold so neatly and orderly most of the time.
People screw up.
Bad stuff happens way too often.
Good stuff doesn’t happen nearly often enough.
Bad stuff and good stuff are not evenly or fairly distributed. (Not even close.)
And just to be clear: when things don’t go like we want them to, it is 100% okay to be bummed, hurt, sad, frustrated, and whatever other feelings pop up. More than okay, I’d say it’s quite healthy to let yourself feel all the feels, and think all the thoughts. For a while.
At some point, though, it helps to remember some things that deep down we already know…
Life isn’t perfect.
Other people aren’t perfect.
We’re not perfect, either.
(That last one still stings a little bit, no?)
Life doesn’t work the way we think its supposed to. Life works the way it works. At some point we gotta stand up and exclaim (perhaps at the top of our lungs):
“Oh lookie here! Life is being all lifey. Again!”
The sooner we do this, the sooner we can remember that we don’t actually need life to unfold perfectly in order for us to survive or even thrive. It helps us to tweak our expectations, figure out a decent Plan B (or Plan C, or Plan ZZZ, depending upon just how many previous pivots we’ve already pulled off) and get back to living the life we’re living instead of wishing for a life that isn’t realistic or possible.
It’s great fun being able to dance around on a sunshiney day, but I happen to know that it can also be quite a hoot to dance in the rain.
And I really believe that we *deserve* for life to unfold like this. We’re good people, darnit, and we’ve earned the right for things to go smoothly!
Here’s the bummer reality: despite what we want and despite what we deserve, life unfortunately doesn’t unfold so neatly and orderly most of the time.
People screw up.
Bad stuff happens way too often.
Good stuff doesn’t happen nearly often enough.
And just to be clear: when things don’t go like we want them to, it is 100% okay to be bummed, hurt, sad, frustrated, and whatever other feels pop up. More than okay, I’d say it’s even healthy to let yourself feel all the feels, and think all the thoughts. For a while.
At some point, though, it is helpful to remember the things that deep down we already know:
life isn’t perfect.
we aren’t perfect.
Other people aren’t perfect.
Life doesn’t work the way we think its supposed to. Life works the way it works. And the sooner and more often we’re able to stand up and exclaim (perhaps at the top of our lungs), “Oh lookie, here is a good example of life is being all lifey. Again!”, the sooner we can remember that we don’t actually need life to go perfectly in order for us to survive and even thrive.
This exclamation allows us to tweak our expectations, figure out a decent Plan B (or Plan C, or Plan ZZZ, depending upon just how many previous pivots we’ve already pulled off) and get back to living the life we’re living instead of wishing for a life that isn’t realistic or possible.
It’s great fun being able to dance around on a sunshiney day, but I happen to know that it can also be quite a hoot to dance in the rain.
Peace,
Paul
P.S. If you need a bit more of a boost about this, take a peek at Ripples #1246 https://mailchi.mp/unleashripples/r1246?
